The 29,931 Day Diet Plan - Copyright Stuart Macfarlane

Food For Thought

The toughest part of being on a diet is not watching what you eat but watching what everyone else is eating.

The best way to lose weight is by skipping - skipping chocolate, skipping ice-cream, skipping donuts, skipping cakes . . .

Dieters Paradigm: Nothing tastes as good as being fit feels!

The most fattening thing you can put in an ice cream sundae is a spoon.

Follow the motto: "A diet should be undertaken one day at a time – start tomorrow."

 

Diet: A short, agonising period of starvation preceding a weight gain of five pounds!

Frazzled by trying to cut out puddings? It’s not surprising. Desserts backwards spells stressed!!

Eating very slowly is an excellent dieting technique. By making breakfast last eighteen hours you can miss both lunch and dinner.

The only advantage of exercising regularly is that you die healthier.

Chocolate is derived from cacao. It is really just a plant that has been processed and had a few things added. Surely something which is plant based can’t be bad for you?

Whenever I get the urge to exercise, I force myself to lie down until the horrid feeling passes.

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out - but I can usually sedate her with a few chocolate cakes.

You are never too old to get your body into shape. My father started walking five miles a day when he was 65. He's just turned 97 and I reckon that by now he must be some 60,000 miles away.

One of life's great mysteries is how a two-pound box of chocolate can make a woman gain five pounds.

The older you get, the harder it is to lose weight for by then your body and your fat have become really good friends.

Strange! If you hang something in your closet for a while it shrinks two sizes!

Why do we never get midnight urges to raid the fridge for fresh lettuce?

Actively avoid strenuous workouts – adopt the philosophy: no strain - no pain.